You.

Guys.

I hesitated even typing this up because I’m having flashbacks and it’s giving me the heebie-jeebies.

But it’s all I can think about right now.

Yesterday, the temps were in the 30s again. So, when Ishu woke up from his nap, I got us both ready to head outside.

Instead of going to the park, I thought we’d walk along the river. Which was all fine and dandy for the first 10 minutes.

Then, as Ishu typically does, he stops to look at all the things. To touch all the things.

WHICH IS, AGAIN, USUALLY FINE AND DANDY.

But yesterday it was NOT.

There are these little condo homes along the river. And they have short black fences in their front “yard,” distinguishing between their space and the sidewalk.

Well, Ishu was curious because there was netting behind the fences. And, perhaps it was flapping in the wind, or perhaps he was wondering why he couldn’t see through the other side. I DON’T KNOW WHY HE FELT COMPELLED TO GO LOOK AT THE FENCES, OKAY.

But I just let him.

Because I like to watch him explore shit.

So, I just stepped back and LET HIM.

And then.

And then.

At the corner of one of the posts, there was something black and fuzzy. And as he reached out to touch it, I dove for his hand to stop him. Thinking it was probably a dead rat or something.

But he beat me to it.

And he TOUCHED it.

So for a brief 2 seconds, I thought, “Well, shit. Let’s go sanitize your hands now.”

And then.

And then.

As I was pulling him away, the creature uncurled itself and started opening up it’s mouth. And I shit you not, it looked like a cross between a rat and a bird and a spider.

And I couldn’t pull myself away, but also, I felt a ringing in my ear. As if it was letting out some sort of high-pitched sound that only dogs could hear.

I saw it’s disgusting looking mouth and saw as it was lifting its head up even further.

So I clutched Ishu to my chest, pushed the stroller down, and ran back.

I quickly picked up the stroller and ran into an alley way, strapped Ishu into the stroller and kept whispering, “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god” while my heart was beating out of my chest and my hands were shaking.

I don’t think Ishu understood what was happening. He just kept staring at my face wondering why-the-heck I was reacting like this.

Once he was in the stroller, I inched my head out of the alleyway to look back at the post and the DANG THING WAS GONE.

I also stopped hearing the ringing in my ear.

But, of course, I was so paranoid that, as I was walking away, I kept looking at the basket under the stroller to see if it somehow snuck in there to try to kill us later.

And then 3 minutes into the walk back toward the park, I could see my hood in my periphery. But, of course, I didn’t realize it was my hood. I thought it was the creature. And so I had a moment of panic thinking it was following us.

It felt like we were in a Marvel movie. And we discovered some weird alien beast. And Ishu touching it was the beginning of something terrible.

But, by the time we reached the park, I had some time to calm down and think rationally.

And it occurred to me that it was a FREAKING BAT.

I had never seen one up close before. But, after some Googling and viewing bat images with one eye open (because two eyes open would be too scary, obviously), I realized it might have been a bat.

And then after Googling some more, it’s apparently common for bats to be hanging out around the river at dusk. (If you’re feeling brave, you can click this link to see a picture that kind of looks like that scary mouth. I CAN’T EVEN).

Who freaking knew?

Anyway, I CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT IT.

I will never get that image or that sound out of my head.

We came home and recounted the story to our parents last night over FB portal. Ishu, again, doesn’t fully comprehend what happened and why I keep bringing it up. But he realizes something important happened yesterday so he’s just running around the place saying, “Ishu. Touch. Bat. Ishu. Touch. Bat.”

And Ankur?

Oh, sure. Let me tell you his response when I tried to tell him I thought I was stuck in a Marvel movie.

“Batman isn’t even Marvel. It’s a DC movie.”

So now I’m here, hopefully garnering some sympathy from one of you because the two boys in my life are RIDICULOUS.

This was a disgusting milestone I’ll never forget.

And, also, probably a sign from the universe that we’ll just stay indoors this winter.