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Prior to working in the public-school setting, I worked at a non-public school for kids with autism. The students I worked with were considered “high functioning.” Generally speaking, a “high functioning” student may have relatively “mild symptoms” of autism which – despite being mild – are significant enough to merit an autism spectrum diagnosis.
Several of the students I worked with struggled with social skills.
What are social skills?
Social skills are the skills that we need in order to interact and adapt in our cultural environment. Things like: taking turns during a game, not interrupting and/or monopolizing conversations, using a filter when communicating (e.g. don’t tell somebody that they’re fat). These behaviors are displayed more prominently when kids become teenagers and social conventions become much more complex.
Some of my students didn’t maintain eye contact for long enough. Others maintained eye contact too intensely. Some of them talked rapidly without realizing others weren’t interested. And, yet, others wouldn’t communicate unless spoken to. Every child was so different. Yet, the group of children I worked with had one thing in common.
They were “high functioning.”
(Source)
This meant that they were well aware that they had autism. They knew that socializing was a challenging experience for them. They knew their natural instinct or response wasn’t the norm, but they followed their instincts anyway.
It did make for some fun Social Skills lessons.
For example, I once asked them, “Why is it not good to be a conversation hog?” Neal responded with, “Because people don’t eat bacon anymore. Everyone’s becoming a vegan.”
I also offered advice.”You know a group has accepted you into the conversation if they open up the circle for you.” Ian’s response was, “Actually, my group tends to hang out in a parallelogram so that statement doesn’t apply.”
They knew they were different. And they didn’t actually care. I loved them for that. When Connor talked about Star Trek for an hour without breathing, it made me smile – wishing that I cared about something with that much passion. When Brandon fixated on the grand piano in the gym instead of getting up for class, I felt envy. That he could completely immerse himself in the moment without noticing anything around him.
These kids are so special. So unique.
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But the rest of the world isn’t as tolerant and patient as the lucky ones who get to work and/or live with these kids. It’s important that these children begin to develop social skills at an early age. By learning and applying the skills they learn, they are more likely to build relationships, live independently, secure a job, and get by successfully in our society.
Here are a list of activities to do with kids that are much more fun and engaging than a Social Skills curriculum.
Activities about Interpreting Emotions:
- Emotional Charades – Instead of acting out TV shows and movies, write out a variety of emotions on strips of paper. Each person will select one of the strips at random and act out the emotion. After the correct emotion has been guessed, a parent/older sibling/counselor can have a conversation about what kind of things lead to that specific emotion. (e.g. If acting out “sad,” it can be followed up with a short 1-2 minute conversation with the child about what types of events make people sad and what the emotion “sad” looks like).
Activities about Communication:
- Topic Game – This is a fun one that can be done in the car! Children with autism may have a tendency to fixate on a particular subject that they enjoy. Sometimes, it’s difficult for them to stay on topic when interacting with others. This game is a simple way to practice that skill. Choose a category (e.g. fruit or vegetable) and everyone has to go through the alphabet – one letter at a time – and choose a word that falls into the category. (e.g. A – apple. B – banana. C – celery).
- Read Aloud/Act Out Stories – Julia Cook’s books help teach children specific social skills through characters in each story. One of my favorite books of hers is My Mouth is a Volcano. This specific story is about a child who has the habit of interrupting others at inappropriate times. The read aloud could be coupled with conversations about interrupting and practicing the strategy of breathing out our “very important words” until it is our turn.
Activities about Self-Control:
- Red Light/Green Light – This is a childhood favorite. Though it requires a larger crowd, it requires no materials and helps kids regulate their behavior by practicing it with two key phrases: “Red Light” and “Green Light.” The group of kids are divided in half. Each group holds hands – both chains facing one another. On “caller”
- Simon Says – Another childhood favorite! It helps kids develop critical executive functioning skills – testing a child’s ability to pay attention, remember rules, and display self-control. These are all the “soft skills” that predict overall academic success.
Board Games Available on Amazon:
Race to the Top – This game has blue “YOU” cards – which help kids practice their manners, creative thinking & feelings, discussing family rules, etc. The green “Q” cards help them practice social skills, positive attitude, and managing emotions. It’s all built into an interactive game which is fun for the whole family to play!
Awkward Moment Card Games – A game for 3-8 players! It places people in awkward social situations. They can face ridiculous, embarrassing, or stressful events! Each person takes a turn as “The Decider” and that person chooses the winning reaction. (It’s kind of like a social skills version of Cards Against Humanity or Apples to Apples).
Teen Talk in a Jar – Discussion starters and icebreakers about every topic that teens want to talk about. It’s a great communication tool and works well in group settings. But just an FYI – there are several cards in here that I had to remove because they were about abortion and sexual abuse – which wasn’t appropriate for a school Social Skills lesson!
Hoot Owl Hoot – In this game, players help the owls fly back to their nest before the sun comes up. If you help all the owls get home, everyone wins! Two levels of play allow this game to grow with your child. Kids are practicing critical thinking, problem solving, following directions, and taking turns in a fun and engaging way!
Stone Stoup – In this game, kids are required to work together to “cook” a soup by making matches of ingredients. Match all the the ingredients before the fire under the kettle goes out and everyone wins! Kids are practicing their memory skills, social development, helping others, and cooperation,
Social Skills Activities
Questions of the Day:
- What games or activities would you add to this list?
I don’t have an autistic child, but I imagine these games would be awesome for any child, especially one (and I have two of these!) who are so high-energy, they have a hard time waiting for their turn to speak, and tend to interrupt without recognizing they’re doing it.
I’m so grateful for this post. Our granddaughter is on the high functioning Autisum scale and it is painful to watch as she knows it and does suffer, especially socially. I’ll be sharing this article with my DIL and trying some of the games. Thanks so much!
My son is a special needs teacher so I will send him this and see what he has to say. Always looking at different ideas.
candy recently posted…Kiwi Dehydrated
These are great. Our social worker did some very similar things with our kids on the spectrum. I taught special ed for nine years before “retiring” to the laid back lifestyle as a mom of four young kids. 😉
kristin mccarthy recently posted…The HPV Vaccination Conundrum: A Debate I Never Thought I Would Have
I am going to look into the games to help my son. He’s 3 years old and going to a school for child development. He does show some signs of autism in his evaluation.
Francisca Ramos recently posted…Valentine’s Day With PUR Cosmetics
These are great! What awesome resources! We are a autism trained campus and have many of these things on site but some I haven’t seen before.
Jessica (@loveyoumoretoo) recently posted…2017 Academy Awards Ballot FREEBIE + Predictions
As a former teacher I have seen many children who are considered to have “high function” autism. You are giving such great ways to practice social skills!
Danielle recently posted…Little Letters {February 2017}
Kids with special needs are still kids. They love to play and be involved. They have good days and bad days. Why don’t we try not see them as kids with a problem but kids who are just kids and do things different from us.
candy recently posted…Kiwi Dehydrated
Excellent games and activities, very effective!
These are awesome ideas and games.I bet they would be super helpful. Pinning for my other teacher friends!
These are some great choices!!!!
Melissa Blake recently posted…Have a Cool Weekend
These are such excellent tips for parents and teachers. I think sometimes as teachers we forget that kids need time to develop their social skills because we are always so focused on academics. I do an activity where we pretend to be at the dinner table and having a regular conversation, but you have to wait until one person is done talking before you begin. It’s hilarious for all of us, but it helps to be more mindful of conversations. I also love “My Mouth is a Volcano”, we all need those reminders! Fantastic activities here for all kids!
Brittany Ferrell recently posted…5 Amazingly Fun Activities That Are Not Just For Kids
“My group tends to hang out in a parallelogram so that statement doesn’t apply.” That right there is why I love working with children. They are so smart and the things they say will have you thinking. This is a great post on a topic I have not seen talked about to often.
Shakirah Iman recently posted…6 Ways Singles Make Valentine’s Day Special
My niece is autistic …. love, love, love this post – it’s from the heart, informative, and it’s all about helping – not just making a buck!
This is such an interesting article! Thanks for sharing 🙂 Working with Autistic children sounds super rewarding to me, I’d love to do it or volunteer with them someday.
Thanks for this post. This is a great resource for parents and teachers alike. I have a friend who has an autistic son. This article will greatly help him understand his son more.
As the mother of a child with Aspergers, anything that helps these kids maneuver their way through life in a fun way is so, so appreciated.
Oooo so much great info here. My daughter has autism. She’s super high functioning and people would never be able to tell since she doesn’t have behavioral issues etc….until you try and talk to her. She rarely talks so the talking gives it away.
This is neat that they make activities like that for kids with Autism. I know a couple friends who this would definitely help.
Alicia recently posted…Loving the Hidden Hearts OS Leggings by Lularoe Natalie Canizal
These activities are perfect for kids with Autism. It’s so important to be mindful of the modifications that they need when it comes to social skills activities.
Toughcookiemommy recently posted…Hashtag Soaps
This is such a great read! Being a teacher in the past, I’ve worked with autistic children before, and I wish I had read this back then. Thank you for sharing these tips! x
Chrissy recently posted…Valentine’s Day Outfit Ideas: 3 Outfits for 3 Different Dates
Fantastic resource! I love the range of suggestions here.
Kids with special needs are the most special ones and I love that we have such social skill activities for kids with autism. This should be so much helpful for my cousin who has a boy with autism and I hope she gets some good results out of it.
This was such a great post for me to find! My youngest daughter is very likely high-functioning autistic, and one of her major issues is the constant need to talk. She literally “never shuts up” lol, and is often getting spoken to about interrupting (or completely ignoring) other people. I hate watching the way it hurts her relationships, and the way that, in turn, hurts her VERY soft heart. I’d love to see a post with other book recommendations for kids like her – she LOVES reading and often soaks up as much as possible from books.
Author Brandi Kennedy recently posted…Works For Me Wednesday: How I’ll Never Sort (Or Match) Socks Again
My daughter probably shares some similarities with your students especially with the part where she can’t maintain eye contact for a long time. It takes a lot of time for her to get accustomed to another person and I’m worried that it might affect her schooling. It might be better to let her participate in group counseling sessions so she can develop her social skills.