Hello from the sky!
This wi-fi on a plane thing never seems to get old.

I’m flying home to Orange County for the weekend! It was a completely last minute decision when I found out my sister surprised the family and flew in for the weekend. So now, here we are.

You may think I’m ridiculous for forking over $8 for wi-fi on a 1-hour flight. Well, I am using any and every tactic to keep my mind occupied so I don’t think about how scary this all is.

Not to mention, a glass of wine would have cost me the same amount. So I pretty much came out even.

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This week has been LONG. I feel like I [temporarily] threw out that work/life balance I was trying to maintain during the 3 weeks of professional development.

It’s the first week with the kids. Kids are getting accustomed to routines, systems, and procedures. Just as I am getting accustomed to the Rocketship style of doing things.

So naturally things take longer, more work needs to get done, and I end up sleeping less (which, I realized today, is not something I am willing to sacrifice. I’m a discombobulated crazy person when I don’t get at least 7 hours of sleep).

But despite all of that, I love it. I love my role this year. I love these kids. I love this staff. And when you love something so much, it really doesn’t feel like work at all.

Today was a particularly special day for us because we were able to develop a behavior plan for one of our students who struggles with attention, hyperactivity, and impulsiveness. Observations have shown that, for every 20 minutes that the student is in the classroom, he is off-task for 19 of those minutes.

Today we tried incorporating a visual schedule that would allow the student to break his long day into chunks. It looked a little something like this but with icons that were more applicable to the classroom.

He knew that when he completed a non-preferred activity, he would get 5 minutes to engage in a preferred activity. This visual cue was to keep him on task (in addition to a token economy that was a more immediate reinforcement for him every time the teacher observed him maintaining appropriate classroom behavior and participating in the classroom activities).

Lastly, we role played with him. We practiced transitions until he perfected them. We practiced everything from moving from the carpet to the desk, the desk to the door, the door to the bathroom. And he loved practicing it because he was able to then understand the expectations that we had set up for him.

I love everything about my day. These students, though they occasionally exhibit challenging behavior, give me an opportunity to think from multiple perspectives in order to best tailor our practice to their needs. If a student can’t learn the way we teach, we must teach the way they learn.

Hello!

Thank you all for such wonderful comments on yesterday’s post. Sometimes I just need a kick in the pants to remind me that I am, actually, good enough.

Today was definitely a much better day at work. I don’t know whether it was because my mindset shifted or because it was the second day of school, but whatever it was resulted in a ton of wonderful things happening throughout the day.

I felt like, ALL DAY, I knew exactly where I needed to be and what I needed to be doing. We sat down and developed a tentative service schedule for both myself and Bruni (the paraprofessional).

We found a way to ensure that all services are being met each week while still having a day set aside for meetings, collaboration time, and PAPERWORK. That is an amazing advantage and I am so lucky to be able to have that flexibility. Although I’m probably going to find myself in the classrooms anyway because that just happens to be way more fun than typing up reports.

The scheduling took a couple hours, it was absolutely worth it. I feel relieved to know that there’s a skeleton in place and we can start implementing it as soon as tomorrow.

Other highlights of today:

• Communicating with a Kinder student in my broken Spanglish. She did not speak a single word of English but somehow we made it work and she worked on her numbers and colors (in English) while I worked on parts of the body (in Spanish). I definitely prefer 5-year old instructors over Rosetta Stone.
• …AND THEN COMMUNICATING WITH A PARENT IN SPANISH. So the girl doubting herself yesterday can go suck it.
• Getting this fun surprise in the mail today from Sister. 

But the best part was the note she included with it.

It’s like she can predict when I’m going to have a stressful day and plans accordingly. Love you Sister.

• Waking up to a Starbucks e-card in my inbox. Even though it’s Tarun Bhaiya’s birthday tomorrow, he bought his sisters a little present for Raksha Bandhan. And he knows I can’t turn down Starbucks. LOVE.
• Getting to go to bed before 10PM tonight. Early morning workout tomorrow. It’s a must. It’s been a few days. Eek. Stop yelling at me.

Good night and sweet dreams!

I survived.

After tearful goodbyes this morning (from both parents and students), several relapses throughout the day where students would shout out, “MOMMY, WHERE ARE YOU?” and no air conditioning in 95 degree weather, we made it through our first day of school.

I felt a little bit like the kids today. I left my job at Cupertino to come work for Rocketship. I left something comfortable, secure, and routine for something new and unpredictable. I’m still not 100% sure what my final caseload is going to be. I don’t know what my service schedule is going to look like. I don’t know the kids, the families, or the community.

And I’m not going to lie – it overwhelms me. The bitch comes out in me and yells at me and tells me I’m not good enough. Tells me that I won’t be as good as the previous ISE teacher. I’m not organized enough. I’m not well-liked enough. I can’t speak enough Spanish to communicate with the parents. I’m not put-together enough. 

I realize how ridiculously cruel I am to myself. I would never, ever, EVER, say these things to any of my children. I work with my students on developing a sense of self-esteem. I teach them how to utilize their strengths to compensate for their weaknesses. But somehow I just bitch myself out and take it.

I need to cut this negative self-talk out. I always tell my kids, “Whether you say you can or can’t, you’re right.” The more I bitch myself out, the more I start to believe it. And that’s not okay.

I will make a conscious effort to start framing things in a more positive way. I will work on being positive and cutting out all the negative energy in my life. It will take a little work. But I am able to control my thoughts and actions.

I’m going to head to bed in just a bit – I feel my sore throat creepin’ back up and want to nip it before it gets worse. But I just wanted to alert the press that I’m alive. I know you were all worried when I hadn’t tweeted for well over 10 hours. But everything is alright.

Have a fabulous night!