Good morning from cold, cold Chicago!

It’s begun.

From having a day in the 70s last week to snow in the forecast this week, we’re all sorts of confusing over here. But I think the official drop has happened and no more warm days.

Fortunately, there is still sunshine outside. It makes a difference when there’s sun!

Ankur just left to drop off Ishu. The crumbs from breakfast are still all over the table. The clothes are strewn all over the bedroom. But I’m taking this moment for myself and going to sit here and share some photos from the weekend.

We had a very Halloween-y weekend.

On Friday, when Ishu got home from school, we watched Casper.

On Saturday, we went to the parade and trick-or-treating event at Lakeshore East Park.

And on Sunday, we went to our friends place for a Halloween party in their building.

Lots of sugar, lots of jumping around, lots of chaos and dysregulation.

But also lots of happy faces, cutest little costumes, and beautiful fall colors.

Ishu’s going to get to dress up in his costume for school on Tuesday. But I think we are going to opt out of trick-or-treating on Tuesday night. He might ask for it next year, but this year, he seems pretty Halloween-ed out. Ha. As am I.

Yesterday, on our way back from our friends place, Ishu was really having a hard time. He didn’t want to leave to go home, didn’t want to put his jacket on in the rain, wanted to only use the blue blanket (without the jacket) even though the blue blanket was wet. He wanted to go this way, not that way. There were a million and one things he was trying to control as my poor little guy just completely melted down.

I knew so much of it had to do with being tired and dysregulated. He had had breakfast, but the only thing he had at the party was a purple punch. So no food, plus tons of sugar, plus a tired kid made for some big big behaviors.

But, as his little face peeked out from behind the blue blanket, hiccuping and saying, “Mama, I’m calm. Can we go home?” As I watched him try to bring his body back under control. As I watched him try to use all the strategies we’ve taught him, my heart just melted.

Here I was feeling a small bit of annoyance that we couldn’t just hop back in the stroller and head home without it being a THING.

While so many other mamas in other parts of the country are unable to say goodnight to their toddlers due to senseless violence and war.

It puts everything into perspective.

Of course, I am human. I have feelings. I understand I can’t operate by pretending they don’t exist.

And yet.

I got to put my kid to bed last night. Give him endless snuggles and kisses. I got to wake up in the middle of the night with my baby. Sniffed him, kissed him, cuddled him.

So, this morning I am feeling a lot of things.

Sadness for so many people. A pit in my stomach thinking about all the devastated families. Grief for the families in our own country that have been broken due to gun violence.

Guilt that my big debacle of the day was getting my kid into a jacket.

Gratitude that I got to kiss my son goodbye this morning.

Love for the sleeping baby who smiles up at me when I come into the room after he wakes up.

All the feelings.

I am sending everyone so much love this morning. The world feels hard and scary sometimes. Hug your people so, so tight.