One of the things I loved most about my meditation class was that it dispelled the notion that meditation is practiced in SILENCE.
Having never been exposed to proper meditation prior to signing up for this course, my only knowledge of meditation came from iPhone apps with sounds of birds chirping, waves washing up to the shore, and rain falling. (The Dalai Lama would be so disappointed).
One of the things that repetitively came up during our 6-week session was the idea that mindfulness is an act of being aware of everything in the present moment. And if the present moment included dogs barking and babies crying, then that was your present moment. Because when you tried too hard to block out those negative sounds and negative thoughts, you created a friction of sorts.
The goal of meditation, as I came to find out, is to create a peaceful mind and body, despite external “distractions” that may surround us.
Our 2nd and 3rd grade students practicing meditation during their Enrichment class.
Why is this important and/or relevant to my life?
If you’ve visited me at work or if you work at a school, you know that it’s RARE to find ANY down time. People constantly ask me why I bring my work home with me or why things aren’t getting done at work.
Imagine this: I sit down to draft an IEP. I’m writing a fluency goal for one of my students. Mid-sentence, a kid walks in who is refusing to go back to class. I talk to them for a bit, walk them back to class, sit back down to finish my sentence, and I’m interrupted with a call on the walkie for some other issue. By the time I am done dealing with that, it is time to pull students for interventions. My work just doesn’t get done at work – ironically.
I’m not complaining. I think it’s part of why I love my job so much. There’s always something going on and each day is so different than the one before. I’m just saying that there is always “noise.” There will always be those distracting external factors in my life. And if I want to keep my sanity, I need to find ways to maintain peace internally.
And I think I do a pretty good job of it for the most part.
But there are still moments when I find myself wanting to lock the office door, close my eyes, and sit in silence for 5 minutes.
It’s just human nature. When we are overstimulated, we seek silence. When there is chaos around us, we want to crawl into a hole away from it all.
So I did it.
I just locked my door, closed my computer and took a few deep breaths.
And then I unlocked my door and went about the rest of my day, a little more refreshed, a little less stressed.
The thing about adults, myself included, is that we seek these solitary moments from time to time to recollect ourselves. For me, I need a couple opportunities throughout the day to retreat like this. I’m much more efficient (and a LOT more friendly!) when I can remove myself from the ‘noise’ – even if it’s only for a minute or two. But we, as adults, so often forget that our kids need opportunities like these as well.
Lately, we’ve been seeing a lot more challenging behaviors from one of our kiddos. He’s constantly leaving his classroom. He refuses to go into the cafeteria during lunch time and, instead, tries to come into our office. In an attempt to provide boundaries and uphold expectations, we’ve “closed” off our room during lunch so that all students know they are required to eat in the cafeteria.
Yesterday, while I was “working” on a report during lunch, he ran in and dove under the table.
I ignored him. I didn’t acknowledge his presence at all. With my silence, I was attempting to convey that I would not give him any attention – positive or negative – for going against expectations.
A few minutes passed and I could hear heavy breathing coming from under the table.
I continued to ignore him.
He became silent and I wondered if I should prompt him to return to the cafeteria and give him an opportunity to turn things around.
I decided against it and continued ignoring him.
After a couple of minutes, he crawled out from underneath the table, hugged me, and, with a smile on his face, said, “Bye Ms. B. I’m going to go back to the cafeteria.”
All I could do was stare at him as he happily skipped down the hallway to join the rest of his class.
My 8-year old student taught me something so valuable yesterday. We can rigidly stick to our rules and expectations in an effort to maintain order. OR we can stop, reflect, LOOK at the PEOPLE we are working with, and seek to understand the reasons behind their behavior.
He needed to retreat. He needed a break. He needed to remove himself from the stimulation. Just for a few minutes.
He needed what I needed. He was just never given the opportunity.
I think I will always struggle with finding a balance between holding high expectations for our students while also giving them what they need. Probably because I work with little humans – not robots. There isn’t a perfect formula. There never will be. But, as I continue working with my little non-robots, I realize how important it is to be aware of just that. They are not robots. They have wants, needs, and concerns – just like I do.
And sometimes, just sometimes, they need to lock the door, close their eyes, and just breathe.
This is such a powerful post. Yes, taking those few minutes to just breath can make all the difference. I struggled and struggled with meditation for so long because I thought that I had to sit still, be quiet and clear my mind and it was so frustrating. Once I let go of those expectations and realized that it’s really about just being present with yourself and your thoughts, it’s been easier. And for our kids? I WISH that our kids today were able to do what your student did.
Christine @ Love, Life, Surf recently posted…Cooking with Coconut Oil Cookbook Review
Love this, Divya!
TriGirl recently posted…Running When I Know I Shouldn’t a.k.a. Sometimes I’m a Stubborn Moron
This was an AWESOME POST!!! Oh my gosh, such a wonderful reminder about the value of just being and letting others simply be!
Amanda – RunToTheFinish recently posted…It doesn’t get easier, but it isn’t that hard
What a wonderful teacher you are. Thinking outside the box and letting your student take a moment to calm down and gather himself. Love all the kids outside with you, teaching a skill they won’t forget.
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I loved this blog. Stopping to breathe is so important.
sometimes the difference between good choice and a bad choice is a few deep breaths.
Such a lovely post…and so true! As a mama with 3 kids in 2 years, I too need these ‘moments’ and time outs have never been punishment; they are just a reminder to take a moment of pause…and reflect.
We often forget to take time to be silent. Silence is such a sacred place to truly become in touch with you.
Beautifully written from beginning to end covering many aspects and situations that truly occur. Many points I honestly admit to forgetting and letting the worst get to me through the day. Need to remember this more.
What a great thing to teaach at school. I meditate with my son at home most days, but that is certainly not when he needs it most.
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Wow, the world needs more teachers like you, Miss Divya. How INSPIRATIONAL to read how you care about these little people, how you love them and try and do anything you can to help them fly. Your story touched me deep in my heart, because I have learned this lesson very recently. Overwhelmed with life in general, I found myself having panic attacks more and more frequently. Meditation is such an powerful tool. Thank you for sharing <3
What a great story. I taught middle school music for many years. I know how important it is to help adolescents develop self-reliant ways to deal with stress. Thanks for your modeling of good teaching and caring.
I love how well you work with the middle schoolers to develop mindset. A positive mind at their age will help them through many tough adolescent times ahead. Good work!
Mindy@FarmFitLiving recently posted…10 Ways to Set Achievable Goals And Actually Meet Them Next Year
This is a wonderful piece. And I agree: sometimes we need a moment. Sometimes it helps a lot. My son has autism and I know deep breaths help ward of meltdowns.
Amber Myers recently posted…7 Things We Must Do During The Holidays
This is a wonderful piece. Loved reading every bit of it. I agree all of us sometimes need a moment,a moment which helps us to calm down and relax.
I love this and it’s so true! You sound like a wonderful teacher, I bet that little boy really appreciated that time out you allowed him.
Lennae xxx
http://www.lennaesworld.com
Lennae recently posted…Matcha & Coconut Bliss Balls
This actually brought me to tears. I have a 7 year old sun with ADHD who is really struggling at school the last month. It’s been bad. His teacher is brand new, and bless her heart, she just doesn’t understand he isn’t Satan’s spawn.. he isn’t even “choosing” to act out. It has taken a toll on his self esteem, and he’s become very anxious about going to school, knowing he “can’t be good there”. (His words).
If only someone would see him in this light at his school! Bless you for the work you do with these often misunderstood children. This was a breakthrough for that little boy. ❤
Nicole@FrugalFamilyFinds recently posted…Motherhood Isn’t Always Sunshine And Unicorns
Love the photos of everyone being still. I have never really mediated but I do enjoy the slience.
candy recently posted…Kiwi Dehydrated
Though I believe in prayer more than meditation, I can definitely relate to just breathing! I’ve struggled with anxiety in the past, and just taking a moment to breathe can make all the difference! 🙂
Abbey recently posted…21 Ways To Intentionally Love Your Husband Every Day
I was an elementary school teacher for many years. During my last year especially (when I knew I didn’t want to do it anymore), I realized that I needed to use my lunch time for some solitude. Many teachers in my building would use their lunch time for having kids finish work, or as a consequence for something they did. They also worked as they ate, so basically not giving themselves a real break at all. If I could stand the pain, I would probably get a tattoo that says, “Be Present”, because I see how important it is!
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I’m going to try this at work too! It’ll be hard since I often am so busy at work that I don’t even take a sip of water for hours but this is such an important reminder to take a step back and regroup.
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Wow this is amazing. You are such an inspiration!
We all need to remind ourselves to just breathe & be more kind & forgiving to ourselves & others! Thank you for sharing 🙂
I can totally relate to you in that situation. I tend to like things “just so”, which leads to me being far too uptight when people do something that I would “never do”. Well….maybe I should try it and I’d feel better. lol. It’s amazing the lessons that kids will teach us and they don’t even know it!
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This was a great read. I love your point of view on meditation and how it’s about finding peace within DESPITE the craziness outside and around us. One of my goals this year is to practice meditating more consistently. Sometimes we’ve got to give ourselves a time out to realign.
This couldn’t have come at a more appropriate time. I have mindfulness and manifestation on my mind lately!! love this article, thanks for sharing!
you are an exceptionally caring teacher. your students are very lucky to have you.
This is such a great post. Sometimes we all need to stop and take a moment and take a deep breath!
Beautiful. Such an important lesson for us as adults to learn, but also so important to teach those we teach. It’s so hard sometimes just to stop, pause, reflect. But so essential, especially now when we are perpetually bombarded by everything. Love your blog – appreciate you as a teacher!
It always amazes me how taking a couple deep breaths can calm you down! One of the features on my new fitbit is a breathing exercise. I’ve actually done it a few time during the day and it’s wonderful!
Penny Struebig recently posted…Five on Friday – February 10, 2017
As a former teacher I feel you about the work. There was always something that could be done (ironically enough, the same can be said for blogging). Have a few minutes to just breathe during the day is so important. Also, it is clear from this post, and your others, that you are a phenomenal teacher, so thanks for being awesome! 🙂
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I love the connection you made between meditation and your work. It’s so true that if you wait for the perfect conditions, you’ll never get anything done. Rather than fighting all of the factors that we can’t control, we need to learn how to focus where we are. Great post!
Love this lesson. 🙂
I love this post so much, Divya <3 and what a valuable lesson that lone wolf showed you, by hiding out under a desk. Sometimes we all need to break free for just a few minutes of the day, and I can see how the kids might need this, too.
I'm sure you are eager to go back to teaching, but I also hope you are using this time to refill your cup 🙂
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What a wonderful reminder! So timely too, I just wrote a meditation post today (haven’t put it up yet!). I do love that meditation is also about acknowledging the noise around us. I completely agree with you too.. sometimes we (and children) just need those times when we can shut everything out for a few moments and collect ourselves so we can move on!
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