I knew this day was bound to come eventually. But I didn’t realize how calm I would be through it all. I anticipated that I’d be flustered and bumbling and scared. But I wasn’t.

Maybe because I have family and friends who have gone through this before. And I know it’s all normal. But, I surprised myself.

It was a mild fever. A little higher than “low grade.”

I had gone to drop Masi and Uncle off at the airport early yesterday morning. And, when I got back around 5am, he was still sleeping. So I crawled into bed and the two of us didn’t wake up until close to 9:30. I was SO excited about it, thinking he was catching up on some sleep. Giving me the gift of sleep, as well.

With one kiss on his forehead, I knew that it was more than simply being tired.

The minute he got out of bed, he reached down to grab a toy car. When he stood back up, he immediately started walking backwards and couldn’t get himself to stop. He plopped down on the ground and burst into tears.

And then it was tears all morning. Tears and needing mama. “Mama, mama, mama, mama.”

Needless to say, he was glued to me all of yesterday. Even during his nap, if I started to inch away, he would start whimpering like a little puppy.

So I just snuggled up to my warm little boy all day yesterday. From morning ’til night.

This morning, he seems to be doing better. But is still clingy and wanting mama.

So mama is what he’ll get.

Back in my early years of teaching, I would always get to a long weekend or a holiday week off and my body would immediately shut down. I hustled until the break and then my body was like, “okay, that’s enough. Now you gotta rest.”

I feel like that’s what happened with Ishu.

He went through the move. Two rounds of visitors. And now his little body is saying, OKAY MAMA I NEED REST. And mama.

I’m kind of glad we have this first fever behind us because I know once he starts going to daycare, he will bring all sorts of germs and viruses home. So at least we know mama can remain calm through it all, y’know?

Now I’m off to snuggle my little guy. I mean, the fever may be down. But he still wants cuddles. And I, for one, am NOT going to turn that down.