It’s always interesting to me that I think shorter weeks are equivalent to “easy” weeks. When, in fact, they are anything BUT easy. Sure, they are shorter. But I feel as though I have less time to cram EVERYTHING in. Which can seem overwhelming and end up being a lot more stressful than if I were to just have a normal work week.

So, as much as I love Women’s Circle and Book Club, it’s not the easiest thing having them on back-to-back days of my three-day work week. Especially when this week’s Women’s Circle theme was International Day and I felt as though I were supposed to show off some of my cool Indian cooking skills.

That was the plan.

But then life happened.

So, instead of chicken tikka masala, we got lots of wine. That’s part of the Indian culture, isn’t it?

In other news, can we talk about how the labels on my beloved Cupcake Red Velvet are so different? I wonder if it’s because of all the negative media…

I felt a little overwhelmed by the end of the work day because I got asked to sub for a class for an hour which caught me off guard since I’m trying to close out a lot of IEPs and have my own services to complete. By the time the day was over, I felt worried that I didn’t have anything prepared for Women’s Circle so I rushed over to Target and was reminded that they don’t sell alcohol at the Target on Story and King. Luckily, there was a Smart&Final across the lot. Hence, the massive wine purchase.

You know when people buy unnecessary amounts of food when they’re hungry? That’s how I feel when I’m anxious and buying wine. Lots. Of. Wine.

Anyway, nobody gave me shit for not showing off my Indian roots. And they were equally as excited for the massive amounts of wine, so I don’t know why I work myself up for no good reason.

Here’s the biggest win of the night.

I’ve realized that, no matter what is going on and no matter what state of mind I’m in, Women’s Circle has become a habit. It’s not something that I ever feel obligated to go to. And it’s not something I would ever pass up because I feel too stressed. If anything, that’s all the more reason to go.

Last night, during check-ins, I picked the goddess card, Ishtar. “Love yourself enough to say no to others’ demands on your time and energy.” 

I felt really connected to this card in many different ways – both personally and professionally. It reminded me of something my sister told me last year: If you don’t value your time and your self, you give other people permission to do the same. 

For most of my life, I’ve had difficulties putting up boundaries. I never knew when to say “no.” I always wanted to please other people and just “show up” even if it was physically draining or taxing on my body or mind. And I thought that if something were presented to me at work, it was something I would just have to take on without any fuss or fight.

But, over the past few months, my priorities have shifted. And I realize that there is really nothing more important than taking care of myself. I’m recognizing that it’s OK to put up boundaries, say “no thank you,” and push back when I feel like my time and energy are being manipulated or taken advantage of.

And, really, I feel like everyone wins in the end. Because I’m just a happier, more peaceful human to be around as a result. The word, “boundaries,” has such a negative connotation. But it’s the intangible “boundaries” I’ve set up over time that have allowed me to love others with a clear mind and full heart.

Questions of the Day:

• What’s a dish [International Cuisine or not!] that your family has made for years?
  
• How are you setting up boundaries and making sure you love yourself this month?