It’s Friday.

I have a warm latte next to my laptop.

I’m done with meetings for the week.

My baby is napping.

My other child walked into school with a smile on his face (for the 2nd week in a row).

It is sunny outside.

We got Ankur a little extra this morning since his first patient wasn’t until 10am.

LIFE FEELS GOOD IN THIS MOMENT.

Ishu’s been really into soccer tennis these days. Yeah, it’s a thing Ishu invented. He’s explained the rules to me a few times. And, from what I’ve gathered, it’s just like soccer. Except that you’re allowed to use your hands whenever you want.

So, anyway, he’s obsessed with the ball. OBSESSED. If you try to do anything while he’s in the middle of playing soccer tennis, he CANNOT HEAR YOU.

The other day, we sat down for dinner. Ishu had already had his dinner so he started playing with the ball around the living room.

One thing led to another and he was kicking the ball around the whole place.

I let him know – kindly – that there were two places he could kick the ball. And the living room was not one of them. If he wanted to keep kicking, he could go out in our hallway or into his room where there were no plants or baby brother.

He kicked it again.

I picked up the ball and looked at him and reminded him of the rules. And I let him know that if he couldn’t follow them, I’d have to put his ball away for some time.

And, of course, what does an impulsive almost-4 year old do?

He kicked it again.

So I picked up the ball, walked over to the washer/dryer unit, and placed it on top, where Ishu couldn’t reach it.

He was not happy with me. Very very unhappy.

When Ankur and I had finished dinner, I took the ball down and said he could try it again as long as he followed the rules.

So the two of us went into his room to play soccer tennis.

And before we started, he looked down at some wooden rings on the floor of his room and said, “Mama, when you took the ball from me, I was so mad and I was thinking which one I wanted to throw at you and I’m sorry for thinking that.”

I smiled so big.

I reached over to pull him close to my chest and I kissed his little cheek.

“You were so mad at me,” I said. “And you thought about what you could do to show me how mad you were.”

“Yeah,” he said, “and I’m sorry.”

“You thought about throwing something at me because you were so angry. And you didn’t do it. Do you know how great that is, my Isha? You really felt so angry but you were still able to control your body and not do the thing you wanted to do. I’m so proud of you, my sweet baby.”

Which is definitely not the thing he expected to hear me say.

But it’s the truth.

My child is almost 4. He is impulsive. And emotional. And I did something to piss him off.

And, despite all that, he managed to control his body in that moment.

HOW CAN I NOT CELEBRATE THAT??

This was a moment where I could imagine people telling my kid, “No, no…we don’t think those things. We don’t think such bad things.”

But, to those of you who are reading this and feel the urge to tell a child not to think bad thoughts, let me just tell you this.

They’re going to have the thoughts.

We all have the thoughts.

The power is in recognizing that even if we can’t control the thoughts, we CAN control our actions.

It’s something that I, as a 37-year old, STRUGGLE WITH DAILY.

And the fact that my kid was able to do that in this moment?

It’s WORTH CELEBRATING.

Anyway, I’m just teary-eyed thinking back on that incident. I’m so proud of who this kid is becoming and I’m so grateful at the lessons he teaches me each day.