It’s extremely validating when the most emotionally regulated human in my life looks up at me and says, “WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?” with his eyes wide and nothing but confusion on his face. 

Very, very validating. 

And, at the same time, a testament to how freaking hard it is to raise little humans.

My good friend texted me this the other day and it made me smile. Because, YES, it’s hard to describe exactly what we’re doing. So she summed it up rather succinctly. She said, “Raising active boys who we’re trying to teach to not be people pleasers but also be respectful men is a whole thing.”

A WHOLE THING. 

It’s hard. 

And, so yesterday, when he went down the rabbit hole of not wanting to go to school and then screamed and cried and melted down into the hallway floor in front of his classroom, I looked up at Ankur and thought to myself, “This is a whole thing.” 

A really hard whole thing. 

I stepped out of the hallway into the other room so I was just on the other side of the door. I could hear everything that was happening, but he couldn’t see me. Because my heart and brain and entire BEING couldn’t handle it. And, thankfully, I could tap out to Ankur. 

And, 5 minutes later, Ankur came out with his mask off to the side, his hair disheveled, and his whole forehead super sweaty. 

Even my emotional support sweet husband isn’t sure how to navigate some of these hard moments.

And it’s validating. 

A reminder that it’s NOT JUST ME FLAILING, WE’RE ALL FLAILING. 

ALL PARENTS ALL OVER THE WORLD ARE FLAILING. 

Because it’s a whole thing. 

A really freaking hard whole thing. 

Thankful for his teacher who e-mailed me back to let me know he calmed down rather quickly. And thankful for a day to get things done. A day to allow MYSELF to come back to baseline a bit. So that when we did pick him up and he was ‘a whole thing,’ I was able to navigate it with more patience and empathy.