Good morning!

We are back in Chicago. And I am currently sitting at the coffee shop taking some deep breaths after a tough battle getting Ishu ready for school this morning.

He absolutely did not want to go.

And I can understand that.

After our weekend in southern California – surrounded by his “great big family,” I can absolutely understand how going to school feels complicated.

This weekend was so special. It went by in a blur – as I imagined it would – but I did stop and pause several times to soak it all in.

I mean, it isn’t every day when your sweet, sweet grandmother turns 90 YEARS YOUNG.

So, to celebrate, we all boarded planes from our respective places across the country, and showed up to shower this incredible woman with all the love.

I can’t even begin to capture it all in a blog post. I’ve been screenshotting our family Whatsapp messages to one another, scrolling up and down our massive shared Google album, and attempting to recall all the little moments I tried to consciously preserve in my already-overcrowded brain. And, still, it all feels quite impossible to summarize.

Hema said it best. She wrote, “It’s incredible to see the roots that Nanu Nani set grow into so many branches.”

That’s exactly correct.

Our Nani is the tree trunk.

The thick and sturdy tree trunk that worked her ass off to remain rooted in the ground. Even when all odds were stacked against her. Even when she had to take care of three girls alone when Nanu was away. She was 8 steps ahead of everyone else. Knowing what needed to get done to ensure her three daughters were set up for success. Nani made sure that my mama and Masis did everything they possibly could so that their futures were bigger and brighter. And then, in turn, when they became mamas, they turned around and did everything they possibly could so that OUR futures were bigger and brighter.

Everything we are – and everything we have the privilege of doing (or not doing) – is a direct result of the sacrifices and love this woman had for her family.

I cannot stop crying as I type this out.

I am remembering a moment – many, many years ago – when I got frustrated with my Nani for asking me to put on a jacket. It felt like such a silly demand. I am IN my body. I am aware of the weather. WHY did she insist on telling me how to dress?

My Choti Masi calmly pulled me to the side. She said something along the lines of, “Nani can no longer run out to the grocery store to pick up a carton of ice cream for you kids. She is no longer able to see clearly and read you a book. So this is the way that she can still show her love. It is a small, simple act. And though it may be frustrating, it is the only way she can show her love right now.”

As Nani got ready for the havan this weekend, I sat on the bed next to her chair. She ever-so-slowly put on her top and then her sweater. I quickly grabbed her nightie from the bed to hang on the back of her door. I wanted to spare her the trip from her chair to the door. Even as I was sitting there in an effort to help HER, she reached her hand out toward my neck to feel for a chain or any accessories. She quickly noticed I wasn’t wearing any jewelry. She abruptly stopped getting ready and turned toward her nightstand. Nani pulled out a gold chain with an OM pendant and turned back toward me. She reached up to place the necklace over my head, moving in real close to see the contrast of the gold against my black shawl.

She smiled and looked at me. And I about broke into tears. Recalling that conversation with my Masi a decade ago.

This is the way she loves. It is how she loves.

And, oh man, how lucky are we to be on the receiving end of that love?

Okay.

Well.

This was supposed to be a recap of our entire weekend. And instead, I’m crying all over my laptop and I’ve run out of tissues and the people sitting across from me at this coffee shop probably think I’m absolutely crazy. Or they’re terrified that I am sick because I can’t stop sniffling.

So I will return tomorrow with a recap of the actual havan and the other fun events that took place this weekend.

For now, I’m just feeling oh-so grateful.

Happy 90th BIRTH-YEAR to my Nani. We are so blessed to carry all the lessons and love you’ve given us over the course of your 90-YEAR LIFE.

We love you always.